With time your life grows a soundtrack of its own. The music you listen to at particular points in time gets etched into the stone of your past, and you no longer can think of a song without remembering a place or a time.
That is until you forget, of course. And that is why I want to make sure I make a note of it when a song has touched me in a special way:
1/11/04 – Belle and Sebastian: The Fox In The Snow. Sad song, perfect for cleansing you out of all the anxiety of the lowest of moments you might have ever come to. “It’s not as if they’re paying you … It’s not as if it’s fun … At least not anymore …” was the punchline, the one that made you cry like a baby looking out that airplane window. It made you think of the reasons you didn’t want to go back. All the reasons why you were probably at the end of a phase.
Nov/Dev 2003 – Cake: Frank Sinatra. Fashion Nugget was the CD that you first listened to over at the now infamous loft on 10th St. in SOMA (San Francisco.) The great audio system made it sound much better than you remembered this song ever sounding before, and there wasn’t really anything in the lyrics that made it stick, it was just the nice percussion intro. It was the song to a lifestyle.
? – Pearl Jam: Grievance, The Verve: Bitter Sweet Symphony, others. Fell in love with her over the wire. And shared some of these songs in the distance, but just as intensely as if being right next to each other might have been. Just as quickly as you had decided you were perfect for each other turns out you realize that is not the case any longer. Bastard.
? – Ani DiFranco: Untouchable Face, Ben Folds: Evaporated, Coldplay: The Scientist. Breaking up with her was hard to do, you even made a playlist of songs that were making you cringe just at the thought of letting go of a very special person. You felt like shit, but in your heart you knew it was the right thing to do for the both of you. Punchlines: Ani’s “Fuck you and your untouchable face … Fuck you for existing in the first place … Who am I? That I should be vying for your touch … Who Am I? I bet you can’t even tell me that much …” Ben’s “Here I stand, sad and free … I can’t cry and I can’t see what I’ve done. Oh, God! What have I done? …” The whole of “The Scientist” while I’m at it. I still have this playlist on my iPod.